It’s official. I have become a crotchety fuddy dud. I just spent the past 20 minutes bent over with my head at the window of my new front loading washing machine berating it,
“That sock in the middle is not getting wet.”
“Surely this is not all you’ve got.”
“You’re gonna pick up the pace any second now, yes? And, actually wash my clothes? With vigor? No?”
“That sock’s still not wet.”
“I don’t trust you.”
Gab walked up and inquired to whom I was talking. The washing machine, dear. I don’t trust it.
I have a new washing machine. And, if you haven’t picked up the hints I’m dropping, I don’t trust it.
We all know I have OCD tendencies toward laundry. I wash certain clothes by hand, I hang dry many, I add extra this and that to certain those and those over there. But, when I throw a regular load of crap laundry like towels and socks in the washing machine, I want to see it churning the ever loving shit out of those odoriferous rascals. And, this fancy pants front loading contraption most of you have already been using for years and I’m just now happening upon? A gentle toss to the right followed by a gentle toss to the left and I’m supposed to believe cleaning is being accomplished? Hmm. I’m skeptical.
Plus, I’m not sure that sock ever got wet.
Here. Let’s steer our attention to this very white, clean shoe.
6 responses so far ↓
Mary Lynn // November 11, 2009 at 11:23 am |
Hmmm…I notice the shoe in that photo isn’t even accompanied by a sock. Did the new front loading washing machine eat the sock?
I’m really not sure that new front loading washing machine can be trusted.
(Is this what they refer to as “enabling”?)
XUP // November 11, 2009 at 5:17 pm |
You know what? I’m just sick to death of all housework. I get up at 5 freakin’ 30 every morning, work all day, get home, make supper, make lunches for the next day, fall into bed. On weekends (the time when I have a break from work) I have to do all the housework chores. Is that fair? Shouldn’t that be someone else’s job since I already have a full time job? It’s the same shit week after week and I don’t even get paid for it.
alejna // November 11, 2009 at 9:05 pm |
I understand your mistrust. Our front-loader can use very little water. It’s a feature. Saving water, and all. But then I go and push a little button that says “water plus,” followed by “extra rinse.” And that way, I know my socks get wet. (I have yet to resort to dumping in extra buckets of water.)
onthecurb // November 12, 2009 at 8:35 am |
Heh, Mary Lynn, my enabler. I know who to turn to if I take up a life of crack, smack, and cocaine.
It is the same shit week after week, day after day, XUP. Shouldn’t technology have advanced enough for a self-cleaning planet by now?
Aha, alejna. That’s what I was hoping for…someone with inside info on the the front-loader. That airplane cockpit control panel on the front is intimidating and I’ve yet to thoroughly read the manual. See, you’re a smart one…PhD smart. Unlike me, the grad school quitter who spends her days cursing dry socks in the wash.
alejna // November 12, 2009 at 10:28 pm |
Ah, but you see, I haven’t read any manual. The buttons on my machine are actually labelled “extra rinse” and “water plus.” If I were to read the manual, I might discover that these buttons actually do something non-transparent, like change the rhythm of the swishing or use carbonated water.
onthecurb // November 12, 2009 at 10:33 pm
Carbonated water, eh? I’m thinking this front-loader may start making gin and tonics any day now. There is that special compartment for detergents and such…I’ll add some gin there and see what happens.